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Old 04-29-2005, 07:31 AM   #1
Metallistar
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Its worth a read.

http://www.factualmaterial.com/douchebag.htm

You probably wont get the Mish. jokes unless you live in Ohio, but the rest is pretty funny.
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Old 05-02-2005, 12:15 PM   #2
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despite the annoying similarities to Maddox on that page, the universal douchebag is alive and well on campuses.

i saw mr. belding from saved by the bell speak on campus last weekend and every douche was in attendance. hey, let's just randomly scream at a guy while he's trying to talk! let's scream "you need ta drink with us at Oscars!!!!" while he's discussing problems he had in his career. let's blatantly drink beer on campus in plain view of the speaker and get kicked out! let's make a total mockery of what the guy is saying! awesome! and i've never seen so many fucking pink shirts in one place. i'd love to get into the conversation i had to listen to about the one asshole telling his friend how he "beat that fucking rice eating chink queer the fuck up" but it's really not even worth.

just suffice to say that if you are that person, i hate you.
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Old 05-02-2005, 01:12 PM   #3
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"the universal douchebag is alive and well on campuses"

And everywhere else.

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Old 05-02-2005, 02:32 PM   #4
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that page color made my eyes hurt.

yes, very much a douchebag, but to be fair, beer tastes like ass, i drink mikes and wine coolers. I definitly dont want a permanant beer face

> - P

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Old 05-02-2005, 04:24 PM   #5
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you just dont know whats good for you now shut up and drink a killians
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Old 05-02-2005, 10:29 PM   #6
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there is definitely good beer out there, you just need to know what to drink.

killians isn't too bad, i prefer a yuengling lager or a fine sam adams summer ale myself. also, though its not really beer, i recommend woodchuck ale to anyone if they can find it. alcoholic cider is delicious and dangerous.
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Old 05-03-2005, 10:19 AM   #7
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awesome, simply awesome.

some of my friends are obsessed with thw popped coller phenominon... obsessed with mocking it.

--

mercurymidnight: holy crap

mercurymidnight: that was the best site ever

mercurymidnight: this guy i knew in high school, brandon, became a frat boy at college.

mercurymidnight: this is his away message:

mercurymidnight: "There are few today who share such lofty ideals, but we're easy to find: Pastel polo shirts, loafers without socks, tucked-in shirts, but most importantly, collars up.

Call me a douchebag. Call me an arrogant little cocksucking dickhead. Beat the shit out of me if I'm not with fifteen of my frat friends (unlikely). But just know this: I interned at Smith Barney this summer. Where did you work? A Blockbuster? That's right you insignificant sack of dogshit; I'm going to be your boss. So take your t-shirt wearing, financial aid, blue-collar ass over to Blockbuster and get me a copy of Old School. Do you even own a tuxedo? You probably don't even know how to sail.

You're so predictable. I bet I can guess your political party just by looking at you. I've wasted enough time with you. Get some rich parents, an internship, and a pink polo with the collar up, and then maybe I'll let you hang out with me."

mercurymidnight: for some reason, i don't think he's joking. DEAR GOD HE'S PATHETIC.
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Old 05-03-2005, 10:40 AM   #8
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hahaha this whole thread is amazing.

i love fratboy away messages/aim profiles.
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Old 05-03-2005, 11:43 AM   #9
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Reading that made my day, rofl.
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Old 05-03-2005, 01:02 PM   #10
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that kids gonna be president some day
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Old 05-03-2005, 02:30 PM   #11
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"MY DAD OWNS A DEALERSHIP!" - ATHF

Man that whole away message is like admitting how much of a punk he is.
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Old 05-03-2005, 03:17 PM   #12
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DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHO MY DAD IS?
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Old 05-03-2005, 03:55 PM   #13
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I dont care how much money you have or who your dad is, a pink polo shirt is always gonna be a red flag for "I'm a homo and think pink(which is a goddamn feminine color) is cool"
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Old 05-03-2005, 04:18 PM   #14
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i think people think its feminine because men are too lazy to find the proper blend of colors to wear... women are just ocd enough to figure it out. (even then, I cant remember last time I saw it worn.)

and the pink shirted douchebags... well... they are gay...
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Last edited by Plain Old Jane : 05-03-2005 at 04:19 PM. Reason: dghmmtddmg
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Old 05-03-2005, 06:13 PM   #15
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That guy's away message is from the Georgetown Heckler:
http://www.georgetownheckler.com/collar.html

Please note the satire.
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Old 05-04-2005, 10:49 AM   #16
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IM BOUT TO THROW.... DOWN...
I ALMOST SAID THROW UP HAHAHHA...
::slump::
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Old 05-04-2005, 04:58 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by malta
"MY DAD OWNS A DEALERSHIP!" - ATHF
great ep.
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