I Love dreams about sex!
 

more later...

haha, here will be a good place for my perversion!

I was sleeping with my girlfriend (actually sleeping) and i think she had her hand down my pants. You know how your dreams can assimilate things happening to you physically? Well I had this dream that i was on a deck of a house with these two young girls and we were talking, then all of a sudden their mother comes out, goes down, and starts giving me head right in front of them!
Now what the hell does that mean?

i havent had a sexy dream in a long time.

last night i remembered my dream, where i was in an abandoned flea market with danny glover and i looked like a real life homer simpson. i was being accused of molesting a child but i knew i didnt do it, and my defense was "I have fucking homework!" but the mom kept telling me i molested her little girl. then out of nowhere danny glover pops open this snake-face hugger hybrid and begins to dissect it. halfway through it i start gagging from the smell and disgustingness of it.

then suddenly the snake head of the face hugger thing comes to life and begins to come after me. but danny glover steps in front of me and is all like"TASTE SOME AIDS!? DOES THAT TASTE GOOD!?" and i found out the danny glover had AIDS and had just infected the creature. but danny dies and i run away with the snake following. then it hides in a closet, balls itself up, and for some reason i have to look for it. then it attacks me but doesnt bite me. i woke up thrashing, struggling with this imaginary creature.

i don't know what the fuck that was all about.

Face huggers are creepy.

I don't have many sex dreams. I've never had one where I'm actually doing it I don't think. I had one where I lived in my old duplex, and next door where my best friend lived were a bunch of hot girls, only my friend didn't live there in my dream. I was walking up the stairs to his floor and I met one of the girls, grabbed her ass and said "Its my birthday". She gave like a botherd sigh and we went up to her floor, where in this room there was a bunch of girls on respective beds in underwear. Someone pulled out a sex boardgame and I spun this spinner, asked "what does this mean?" and she said "That means you get to finger me"

And I woke up. Oh well.

Had one last week ...
I was at my old High School on the driveway/hill that went up to the parking lot sitting on like a road barrier (one of those concrete things) and there were like ... 5 girls from my college around me. They weren't girls from my college, like I didn't recognize any of them, but I just knew that they all went to my school. And they started getting naked, but each of them had like ... one article of clothing on that the others didn't. It was really weird. They also all had weirdly shaped sexual body parts ... like breasts that were big, but really narrow... or like odd shaped thighs.

IT was weird.
Then I felt like I was pissing my pants in the dream and I had to run away ... turned out not to be piss in real life ... had to change my clothes.

It was really, really odd.

Additionally, like 10 minutes after I woke up and changed my clothes, my girlfriend got into bed with me ... and it would have been really akward had she like gone digging for something and just gotten ... a moist surprise.

wait it wasnt piss in real life but you had to change your clothes? i dont get it.

he came in his pants, if i read right.

forgot to put my story in yesterday so here it is to the best of my recolection.

Ok, I was hanging out over at my friends house when suddenly I was in the shower... well I was done and I needed a towel and the only one was being used by my friends hot sister. Well, she procedes to take the towel off her self and give it to me. So I follow her up to her room and she has on some skimpy underware no braw and micky mouse ears (fuck if i know). I walk up to her (In real life she is really shy) and start to kiss and finger her and she pushes me on her bed starts to grind on me and then i wake up... ALWAYS WAKE UP AT THE GOOD PART. FUCK

Who wouldnt want to get head from a MILF with to hotties watching....

i had a dream last night*... here's how it goes...

for some reason i was at a bar, even though i'm not actually 21 yet, but i was there drinking. i was getting pretty hammered when this really fat chick comes over and starts hitting on me. i was aparently pretty drunk because i kept talking to her even though i wasn't attracted to her and she was a stupid bitch. somehow i wound up at her house where we smoked a bong. she started getting frisky with me, and i felt too bad for her to just say no and leave. it took me a while to find it through her fat rolls, but eventually i made it to her deep crevase and started my work. my arm felt like it was in a vat of jello. anyways, things proceeded on and next thing i know i'm wearing a strap on dildo plugging both of her holes. i was getting her doggy style, which was nice because she didn't notice the fact that i wanted to vomit. i looked down beside her bed and i noticed a louisville slugger. i knew i had to get out fast, and this could provide me with a quick escape. so, i waited until i was about to blow, and then WHAM, baseball bat to the back of her head, out cold. donkey punch. her sloppy vag tightened immensely, which put me in a euphoric state, the only enjoyment i got out of the evening. i pulled my pants up, but then decided to get one last move in. i reached down the back of my pants, stuck my finger up my butt, and smeared it on her face giving her a nice poostache. i ran out of the building as fast as i could, and made it home safely.



*dream may not have actually occured, i might just be really fucking bored.

fact and fantasy blurring there, raub?

I dunno neil, smell his finger.

raub, best fake dream ever...

okay, the only recent and consequently, the most powerful, sexual dream I've had in the last few months... is a little wierd... not as disgusting as raubs, or as hawt as mikes... kind of.... natalie-flavored...

I dreamed I was in the city, walking home, and as I walked in my door, I saw someone had put the most awesome christmas lights in the world all over my ceiling. and there was this girl... shes... the closests person to me in life. Prolly the only person I would take a bullet for. She runs upto me and plants one on my lips and I guess she asked what I thought of the decor. I dont remember her opening her mouth at all. I remember saying I loved it. She then hit the remote for the stereo, which played... a sort of jazzy kinda alk3 for some reason, and it was REALLY good, even tho it doesnt exist in real life... I cant remember how it went now for the life of me... But for in your minds eye sake, it sounded like Aphex Twin - Girl-boy song...

She kissed me and lead me to the couch and undid my blouse and started kissing my neck and shoulders, and I squeaked... she smiled and continued downward, taking my... surprisingly larger breasts than in real life into her mouth and going to town. I was in heaven.. Like, I could feel it, and it was driving me crazy. Then... here comes the good part.... then she reaches her hand down the front of my pants and strarts rubbing me... and while I'm squealing and shaking under her, she sticks her finger in me, and I launch into wakeyhood to a full on orgasm of biblical power...

I didnt stop shaking for an hour...

Moral: Hormones give you the occasional vivid dream about sex that send you spiraling into orgasm that leaves no mess.

Gaz win...

I had a dream last night that I was being chased through the local mall by zombies... slightly less sexy than THAT dream...

bah needs more sex...

much better

What's with the sudden rash my name appearing in people's signatures saying things about penis's? ARE YOU GUYS TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING? AND WHERE DID THIS SUDDEN RASH COME FROM?

::scratches self::

Dude, when they say they're clean, pretend they're lying.

that works the other way around too, right?

...right?